By ΕΛΛΗΝΙΚΑ (GREEK) TÜRKÇE (TURKISH)
Okay, at least our guy had mediated on behalf of a love-struck Malaysian. [Translator’s note: reference to Archbishop Chrysostomos’ intervention in favour of the citizenship application of Malaysian financier-turned-fugitive Low Taek Jho] He saw the man anxiously desiring the passport of the island of the goddess of love – it was, you see, when he was love-struck over Hilton – he would buy a house from a partner, he was also going to give a little something to the seminary as a contribution… How much more does it take for your sensitivities to kick in? If you are also a man of God, your sensitivities are even greater than those of Kaiti Garbi in the well-known song. [Translator’s note: reference to a 1997 song titled “Sensitivities”] So, he sat down and wrote a letter to Socrates Hasikos – please see to it, he told him, because in a few days this good man will pass through Cyprus, let’s have it ready to take with him so that we won’t have to send it by courier and pay for shipping as well. [Translator’s note: the Archbishop acknowledged in 2019 that he had written to the then interior minister Socrates Hasikos recommending approval of Low’s citizenship application, while also noting that the Malaysian had made a €310,000 donation to the Theological School] The other guy saw to it, with the well-known effective process of scrutiny, applied by the European state of the Republic of Cyprus – that is, “tick tick and it was approved” – and so it was, within just a few days, Jho Low became our fellow villager. [Translator’s note: reference to Hasikos’ testimony before a committee of inquiry looking into the citizenship-by-investment scheme where he described the application process in the manner of the quote above]
In Greece, however, they took this sport to a whole other level. The Church, reports an article in Politis newspaper – seems to have mediated so that a Turkish man, who is also a citizen of the… “Turkish Republic of Northern Cyprus” was baptized, not an Orthodox in a baptismal font, but a Greek in the registrar’s office! He contributes to the development of the island of Aphrodite by maintaining a casino in Kyrenia, he is involved in online gambling cases and, in addition, some shadows are cast on him regarding a murder… The Turk, however, had offered, they say, medicine and medical equipment worth 300,000 euros (he got the passport cheaply – ten thousand less than what the fellow villager gave to our seminary) and this was duly appreciated by the Church of Greece which, due to distance, is even closer to Kaiti Garbi. He also has a “Cypriot passport” they are thinking – what does it matter if it is from the “state” of the north, in our student years they were even asking us if we speak Greek or Turkish, are we going to get stuck on the geographical origin of the passport now? So the priests seem to think this is okay. But the services of the Greek state? “Tick tick and it was approved” there too?
Okay, comrades, we got it. Andreas Mavroyiannis is an independent candidate. The synchronised posts – with the identical phraseology about “independence” – of those who were impressed from watching his recent speech, leave (us) no room for doubt. We will write it thirty times on a sheet of paper – “Andreas Mavroyiannis is an independent candidate” – so that we don’t slip up in the future.
Excuse me, Mr president, it is about time you gave it a rest. You will remember, the late Spyros Kyprianou used to say it, in the glorious years of the straitjackets, Neurobion, Ativan and the imaginary spies: “For us, power is not everything, but if others come to power the country will be ruined.” You will, I suppose, also remember Demetris Christofias, who said: “There are leaders in the international community who cannot imagine Cyprus without me as President.” Do you remember these? So why did you have to go and say the unconstrained: “Do not betray your country”?
And, between us as always, does one betray his country by choosing a candidate of another party or an independent, or by brainstorming left and right and proposing, even to the enemy, the creation of two states?
Have you lost touch with reality perhaps? Or, perhaps, because from 2017 onwards you started to lick where you spat and, with a 20-year time delay, you supposedly “discovered” what others were claiming when you were standing them up against the wall, do you think we should give you a medal now?
Okay, a fun break is in order: Marinos Sizopoulos believes that an announcement by AKEL asking for explanations of some strange dealings of his, “was done on purpose, to torpedo the prospects of cooperation and support for Mavroyiannis by EDEK”! As if the prospects were there and AKEL torpedoed them.
How did the Turkish Cypriot woman put it, in the edited photo of Pentadaktylos? “We all need therapy”!
Elefthera, 10.7.2022.
Source: BREATHING EXERCISES
