By ΕΛΛΗΝΙΚΑ (GREEK) TÜRKÇE (TURKISH)
Well sir, if we were to look at it in the simplest of terms, the political party known by the acronym DISY, is the “UBP” [National Unity Party] of the South… This party elected its new leader last week… In other words, held its [party] congress. Annita Demetriou became the first female leader of this party at the congress…
Demetriou was also the country’s first female speaker of the house…
She is 37 years old…
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Demetriou received the support of almost 70 per cent of the party’s voters…
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Just then, two unknown agents from Greece kidnap Demetriou for two hours…
Allegedly, the Greek President and vice-president did not want her to become the party leader…
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Just then, I’m keeping it short, a chap of Greek nationality drives his car straight into Demetriou’s car who is out for a cruise with her husband to get some fresh air!
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Demetriou returns to raising her hand at the house of representatives and resumes her profession as a lawyer…
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Meanwhile, an operative named “Memedagi Gayagis” who was assigned from Greece and who gives instructions to Nikos Christodoulides starts efforts to find a new leader for DISY.
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Is such a thing possible?
Is it?
Where else did all these things take place?
In the TRNC!
Within the UBP!
Please see: In the days of the hammer drill when they even wanted to change Faiz Sucuoğlu’s name…
They wanted to change Sucuoğlu’s surname to “Boruoğlu” but then there was no need. Because they literally made a water pipe out of Faiz and what is sad is that not even a single person from the UBP dared to ask, “hey what are you guys doing?” I guess this is what respect for democracy means!
It just never occurred to us!
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Anyway, the election of Demetriou as DISY leader is for sure related to different balances within the party and the woman’s own qualities but when looking from the outside, one sees an incredible rejuvenation [within the party] and a magnificent example of democracy…
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The TRNC?
Sovereign equal state!
I’m going to say, “….the equality of your master, …the sovereignty of your master!” so that we don’t insult the midwife who brought you into this world!
I just wanted to give a simple example that described how this “sham” of a place named the TRNC is not a “state”, but an “unspectacular colonial territory”!
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What is Ersin Tatar saying?
I won’t sit, I won’t sit!
In the sense “I won’t sit at the table!”
I will not sit if they don’t accept our sovereign equality!
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Don’t make too much of a commotion or you’ll annoy Memedagi Gayagis.
Ersin Tatar, my cousin, my brother, my dear, my love, the pride of our nation, the shah of beauties, the pure leader, the king of kings, the chocolate of brothers…
You keep going to Friday prayers for the time being…
But the opinion polls look bad…
Should the opinion polls sway in favour of Mr Kemal [Kılıçdaroğlu] towards May, you should switch to giving lessons on “Atatürk, Atatürk’s Principles and Reforms”…
You’ll first start by showing up to Friday prayers only once every two weeks and then switch directly to the tavern; you should prepare a message for the morning of May 15, “we are proud of you Mr Kemal Kılıçdaroğlu”…
“Ok, my brother!”
Calm down, calm down, Memedagi Gayagis will not be there…
Maria from Kormakiti says, “Don’t be afraid honey, don’t be afraid”…
Sovereign and equal!
And Zorlu’s cat meows, “meow meow piss.”
This application doesn’t include the TRNC babe!
Covid-19 almost took me out in Covid-23
Those who see me would say a 115kg giant 1.90m in height should not be so capricious!
(I was 135kg until 6 months ago and now I am 111 my dear doctor Ahmet Özyiğit…)
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I can’t say I wasn’t whimsical with my dear wife when I had Covid…
It’s true, I enjoyed a good rest, particularly on Friday, Saturday, and Sunday…
It was nice to be pampered a little…
But on Wednesday and Thursday, for a whole 48 hours, this goddamn Covid haunted me like a horror film!
At one point I would be lying if I said I didn’t think about “getting up and writing my will!”
In fact, I got up, grabbed a pen and paper, only to notice that I have no property or possessions to include in my will!
I have a bank loan; a hunting rifle, a few computers…
I gave up…
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My wife kept making me soup and tea…
After a couple of hundred painkillers, towards Friday night, so to speak, though feeling a little frail, I felt ready to charge the arena like a “bull” at Spain’s largest bullfighting ring Las Ventas… I would clear out all the matadors together with their extended families!
By the way, have they banned bullfighting?
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Anyway, I told myself since I’m going to return to my programme on television on Monday that I should go “get a PCR test”…
The rest of this article is dedicated more to my older brothers Ersin [Tatar] and Tahsin [Ertuğruloğlu]…
Yes, I went to a private hospital, and paid ₺250 [€12] to enjoy a PCR test after months! That swab went up my nostril and was pushed up all the way to my brain!
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They told me, “We’ll inform you of the results by 7 pm.”
Around 7:14 pm I received a message from another private hospital…
It read, “Download an application on your phone named KİB.”
It’s apparently short for “Kendine iyi bak” [Take care of yourself]…
I downloaded it…
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The moment it says, “you can now access your test results”, a screen pops up before you asking you to, “enter your ID details”…
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Right next to it is a small TC [Turkish Republic] flag…
I’m trying to enter my TRNC ID details…
“Not accepted” it reads…
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I play around with the application, and apparently, the flags and as a result, the IDs of all the countries in the world are available on the app.
I search, search and search!
There is no TRNC flag, nor it’s current name or any name variations of it should they have changed the name of the TRNC and we have yet to be informed!
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My dear president Ersin, my dear Tahsin brother; May God be my witness, you can select “Cyprus” on this “Health Ministry” application!
With its flag and its name in Greek!
Cyprus my dear!
The sovereign and equal one, the other side, the other side… Our enemies my dear!
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Anyway, I hesitantly call the hospital…
The person on duty tells me, “it’s really easy to access your results, Mr Serhat, enter your ID details…”
Okay but I “don’t own such an ID” …
I try entering my British passport, but no success there…
If I do say so, I try with my Republic of Cyprus ID, but again it won’t accept it…
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My honey bunny big brother Tahsin and my dear big brother Ersin, May God be my witness (amen); the chap on the phone tells me “You are negative sir, get well soon” and so I take a sigh of relief!
I have my PCR result; it exists!
But the TRNC doesn’t!
The TRNC also has a hospital!
In fact, it has two, I had a test done in one, and I will receive results from the other!
But the “ministry” does not belong to the TRNC, it belongs to the TC [Republic of Turkey]!
And the “ministry’s” application, does not include the TRNC!
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May he rest in peace…
If one of the best kebab chefs in the world Anibal was alive today, he would say, “this application doesn’t include the TRNC babe!”
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This is the situation!
I mean, this is the state of the TRNC!
In short, we’re screwed!
[Photo insert: Logo of the application in question]
I would like to wish a happy March 14 Medicine Day to all our health workers, particularly those working in the earthquake-stricken areas…
I hail your services.
Source: CAN GREECE NOT CHANGE THE NEW DISY LEADER? (ARE WE NOT SOVEREIGN AND EQUAL?)
