In Turkey, ‘honour killings’ and ‘customary killings’ are very common types of murder…
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“You’re mine, or no one’s.”…
“If I can’t have you, no one can.”…
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In films and TV series, this is portrayed as if it were a form of ‘encouragement policy’!
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Is this love, or hatred?
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The person cannot accept losing the one they love, or that they might choose someone else, and says, “If I cannot have you, I will kill you”!
And they kill!
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‘Honour’, ‘pride’ or ‘family reputation’…
These are the justifications!
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What sort of cultural mindset is this?
It’s not easy to understand from a Western perspective!
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Of course, in this culture, ‘100 per cent of the killers are men’, whilst ‘90 per cent of the victims’ are women!
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Why are 90 per cent of the victims women?
Because, amidst all this ‘honour’ and ‘dignity’ nonsense, male victims are occasionally targeted due to their sexual orientation!
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A request for divorce is a reason for murder!
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An allegation of having had a sexual relationship with someone else is, again, a reason for murder!
Sexual orientation or lifestyle, likewise!
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So, are there ‘honour killings’ in the Turkish Cypriot community, or in Cyprus as a whole?
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We know that a similar incident involving a hunting rifle took place in the village of Elia recently!
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However, I’m not sure if we can exactly call it an ‘honour killing’…
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Anyway!
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In Turkey and more Eastern countries, there is also something called a ‘customary killing’!
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Thanks to Turkish TV series, we’re learning about these too!
And with ‘pride’, no less!
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Thank God, we don’t see this sort of thing in Northern Cyprus yet, but still, I’m not sure!
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In different cultures, there can be very different ways of life and, of course, very different reasons for ‘murder’!
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Should we respect it, or not?
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A culture that involves violence should not be respected, but with education and social support, it is possible to eradicate this culture!
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It was back when I was living in London…
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One day, I saw our English neighbour, a woman, crying in the garden!
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I’d burst if I didn’t ask!
So I asked!
“Why are you crying? I hope it’s nothing serious,” I said…
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My neighbour told me that her 16-year-old daughter had never had a boyfriend in her life, and that this worried them greatly!
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“Why are you worried about that?” I asked!
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The woman replied quite matter-of-factly, “…She absolutely must have a relationship with someone, whether a girl, or a boy!” she said!
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That’s certainly a perspective quite far removed from Eastern cultures!
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Around the same time in England, there was a murder case I’d been following from the sidelines!
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A Turkish family couldn’t accept their 16-year-old daughter befriending a young man of Christian Lebanese origin, if I’m not mistaken!
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And the family council sat down and decided to have the 16-year-old girl killed!
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They threw her out of a flat window!
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A typical honour killing!
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And after a lengthy investigation by the police, it emerged that the incident, which had been staged to look like a suicide, was in fact a murder; the youngest male member of the family had confessed to the crime!
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In the TRNC, or Northern Cyprus, extremely strong laws must first be enacted—for the purpose of protection—regarding women killed on grounds of ‘possession, honour, custom, habit, tradition, or culture’…
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But can we really prevent such murders with laws alone?
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Whether they come from a different culture, or are locals here, it makes no difference; male dominance in the TRNC is not a structure that “views – or is capable of viewing – women as equals”!
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At best, a woman’s ‘voice’ outside the home is non-existent!
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Indeed, it is a bitter truth, but in many quarters, as Nazım Hikmet said, a woman is “second only to our ox at our table”!
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What I’m saying is: unfortunately, it won’t be easy to prevent these murders through legislation!
Besides, if the Turkish authorities say ‘you cannot do this’, the lawmakers won’t do it – and that, too, is a separate ‘matter of honour’!
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And the current trend clearly shows that we will either have to get used to the rising numbers of murders of women – or, we will have to get used to them!
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It’s also worth noting that, as Nazım Hikmet once said, ‘our place at the table comes after that of the ox…’!
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In Northern Cyprus, women may not currently come after the ox, but the trend is heading in that direction!
I’m so sorry!
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Now, how is it possible to not link this issue to the ‘European Union!
How is it possible to make an implication to Tufan Erhürman on this matter!
How is it possible to not write that a political solution in Cyprus is essential; otherwise, the situation in the North is heading not towards the light, but towards darkness!
Source: THE FUTURE POSITION OF WOMEN IN THE TRNC: HER PLACE AT OUR TABLE COMES AFTER OUR OX!
